Saturday, May 30, 2009

Johnny's coming in June

A reminder of all your old favorites...

Friday, May 29, 2009

I never wanted to be your weekend lover...

I only wanted to be
some kind of friend.

Animals of My Emotions: II. Yoo Hoo, Kangaroo

This poem is about my feelings
Yoo hoo, Kangaroo
I know where you sit
Propped up by a tail
Of deceit
I am not your joey, Kangaroo
I see your razor sharp toenails
They tear through me, and my emotions
I cannot hate you
But I am afraid to love you
Will you protect me, Kangaroo?
Will you? Will you be my protector?
Will you protect me? Will you?
Or will you punch me twice
In the privates and once in the face
Like Bonnie did when she left
And then hide in the bathroom, Kangaroo?
And then call her mother's house 7 times
And leave message after message, Kangaroo?
And then slash the tires of the Taurus?
Will you protect me from the leopards of loneliness
And her vicious tentacles?
Will you please just hold me right now, Kangaroo?
I see you move so fast
And your head is like
A bunny and a deer
Mixed. But you can also
Yoo hoo, Kangaroo
This Poem is about my feelings.

Thursday, May 28, 2009


As you can see I have already created a new and more musically conducive atmosphere in which to bring you my deepest thoughts and dreams. I deeply regret the loss of my animal poll in the transition. In the world of information/technology sometimes these things cannot be helped.

I can report that The Hyena of Halitosis won the poll of most despicable animal with 60% of the public vote. Marla's Dream Whale followed with 30%.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

It's Here

Johnny Showcase’s mission: to rock your sweet face off. Purr, Pull, Reign exposes the tortured soul beneath the mad genius of this “top shelf Rhode Island crooner”. Experience this underground sensation, take it to the next level, shower yourself in lilac agony. You will be formerly known as not blown away!

Coming to the 2009 Philly Fringe!

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Getting into shape for "Purr, Pull, Reign"

Midsummer Night's Dream

comes upon the heels of despair. My divorce with Bonnie is still at full throttle. She has been having her lawyer crank call my house, doing perverted versions of my songs, like "Shit it, You're a Hack" and "Fingernail Sticking a Baboon". At first I think it is a fan, and I want to compliment them on at least getting some of the words right. Then I hear Bonnie's cackle in the background. And I know.

You got the Ford Taurus, Bonnie. You got half my butterfly collection. You get to have my sense of joy on the weekends and holidays. Why do you call me drunk at 11:30 in the morning? Don't you know I am sleeping?

Rumi Kitchen, my spiritual adviser (as well as legal representative in this case), has helped me with some breathing techniques for tranquility and harnessing. Also the words of Gary Wilson have been very comforting.

Monday, May 25, 2009

Animals of My Emotions

I. Hyena Hyena

That cloud looks like a hyena
I hate that cloud.
It is literally a box
In which I put all my doubt
Pseudo-penis swinger,
Big dicked killer,
Kill your brother?
What are you, America?

Sunset like a tarantula
I hate that cloud.
Hyena, hyena
Your legs are many
Your enemies are some of my favorite people
Like the lion mane,
Mainly awesome
I champion his soul
I punch you in a thousand faces

Hyena, hyena
Pontious Pilate sicko
Hyena Hyena,
What, you're still here?
Run away!
Disappear! Disappear! Disappear!
I've punched you one thousand times
In my mind's eye
Hyena, hyena

That cloud looks like a hyena
I hate that cloud


Sometimes I wear my heart on my sleeve...